i feel i failed.
but you see, sq's encouragement do make me feel slightly better. slightly only. but i think one word from you makes wonder to me. shags. why am i feeling this way. i know you wouldnt even notice why im feeling this way. sigh. its futile anyway. i know,cos you wouldnt even..care? it doesnt matter anyway(: perhaps we wouldnt even maintain that little friendship we have,or wadeva r/s we once had. i guess we'll lead our life like yours and mine, no crossing of paths, just parallels. i'll lead the way i always wanted, &you can still slack your way through like you always do. you are still who you are, i may have changed by then.
for the worse i guess. idk but nothing's holding me back, perhaps you cant too. i dont know what im blabbering.i just want to continue writing.i hate my life now:/ FCK. I HATE IT.

do you really understand?